Merino Wool and Damn Europe

I can't believe that I just said that. After all, I am part Dutch and have lived in Vienna, Austria for a good deal of time. Don't get me wrong. And, don't make this out to be an un-patriotic rant by man-hating lesbian because I am neither of those, well except for the...you know.

At this moment in time, I am confused. Why does Finland, Denmark, Austria, Holland, (etc) have H&M online shopping? Why did I just find this out? Why is the word "sweatshirt" also "sweatshirt" in German? It should be Schwitzhemd. Just saying.

Now, I realize I talk a lot about H&M. I am as of now their unofficial representative to you.

Moving on...

Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, starring Matthew Perry (my favorite Friend) and Amanda Peet (The Whole Nine Yards), is this witty new show that has occupied my computer for the past couple of days. It takes place behind the scene of a fictional comedy sketch show similar to Saturday Night Live and the network, National Broadcasting System. I'm just now getting to the part with the heavy drug use and I was able to see that story line coming from the very first intro. Aside from the fact that it depicts "deviant" behavior, the story is clever and the dialogue is sharp. Sharp as in "Ooooh, cuts like warm butter." Whereas Private Practice is sharp as in find me a sharp knife to slice off my ears so that I don't have to listen anymore.

Yes, I do watch a lot of TV. If you don't, then you're overworked and live in a cool place. I'm stuck in Suburbia for 4 more months. Excellent. Give me a break. But, Suburbia has malls and malls have H&M. See how I just did that? We went back to my favorite topics, H&M and me.


So yesterday I had an interview and my mom didn't say any hateful words as I picked out my outfit.



Price: H&M Green, I mean "Olive" Button-up Shirt, $35.00; Black leather belt, $7.50; Grey pleated pants with black and blue pintstripes, $54.50







Price: H&M Black and Grey Argyle Merino Wool Sweater, $39.95








So, yes, the interview was yesterday, and I took these pictures today at 8:30am. I just needed any excuse to put the clothes back on.

An Ode to H&M

Actually what exactly is an ode? Wiki says:

An ode (Classical Greek: ὠδή) is a form of stately and elaborate lyrical verse. A classic ode is structured in three parts: the strophe, the antistrophe, and the epode. Different forms such as the homostrophic ode and the irregular ode also exist.

Homostrophic is an amazing word. It feels like a blend between Jack MacFarland and a natural catastrophe.

This particular ode is more of a visual ode. It comes in three parts: the bottom layer, the first layer and then the warm fuzzy layer. Scared yet?

Long-sleeve shirt with thick black and white stripes. Makes a skinny little me look wider.

Price: $20.00; Yorkshire Terrier not included.








Price: H&M Belt, $6.70; Banana Republic Jeans, $54.50









Black button-up shirt with grey pinstripes

Price: $29.99





For some reason, I couldn't resist buying this grey sweater vest. I think I'm going to need to bulk before I wear this out in public.

Price: $39.99

OurChart

This morning I watched the latest episode of the L Word. Then I decided to expand upon my profile from OurChart.com. That's right, I may only have one friend and zero friend pluses (girlfriends, hookups, one-night stands, benefits, etc), but that means squat. The original University of Pennsylvania chart is here in my bedroom in a notebook, with a small appendix to Bryn Mawr. No, don't worry, I'm not going to divulge any juicy details. What's the point of having this technology, if no one has signed up for it? This, ladies and queens, is a crime. Right now I'm basically committed to inviting my "Friend Pluses" to the site so that I don't look like a Puritanical loser. If you knew me, you'd know that's a farse.

Now, another crime is that H&M doesn't have online shopping. How am I supposed to sit at home and buy stuff online if I can't? I recently applied to H&M (meaning a couple hours ago). My reasoning being that I would save thousands of dollars in employee discounts. It's true. My closet is an H&M showroom. On Friday, I recently bought some things from there. Just a few.

And because H&M has very limited amounts of images of their collection...You'll have to imagine me in everything they sell.

My only other qualm with H&M is that their Manassas Mall store has no Men's Department. Where is a genderbending gal supposed to shop? I have to drive 20-30 minutes to get to my version of Meccah.

But, I do want to buy this blazer...
And maybe if I get a job at H&M I could afford it. I mean I could scrape up the money, max out my credit card, but that's the old me.









Also, I had to post this picture up. Every lesbian or androgynous woman needs a good black button up shirt accented with a skinny white tie. A lesbian can never own too many ties. They're not only cute and a great accessory. They are also an amazing foreplay tool.
But, look at this picture real closely for a second. Is that me? I could swear that that's me looking all male-modelesque.



Price: Blazer, $49.99; Black Shirt + Tie, $39.95

A night at the Oscars

And the Oscar goes to...Barely anyone that I chose. Seriously, where are these Academy Awards betting pools I heard so much about? I always have had a soft spot for losing money. Did anyone in Hollywood watch Atonement? Didn't think so. Who am I to expect anyone to want to watch Keira Knightly in a perfect green dress? James McAvoy's feminine mystique makes me want to switch teams. The script. Uhhhh. I'm swooning in my swivel chair.

I'm not the usual perp when it comes to tearing up during a movie. By the end of Atonement I was trying to discreetly wipe away the vast amounts of flowing tears streaming down my cheeks. Does this make me a romantic? Perhaps.

I told myself earlier today that I was not going to quote a movie in this blog unless absolutely necessary...This time it's necessary. I'm about to cry simply thinking about this movie.



Cecilia Tallis: I love you. I'll wait for you. Come back. Come back to me.


Robbie Turner:The story can resume. I will return. Find you, love you, marry you and live without shame.


Tear.


One thing that I can take away is that the Bourne Ultimatum won at least something. Those petty handouts will not keep my satiated. I also don't understand how the gorgeously and fabulously beautiful Cate Blanchett walked away with nothing. That woman has a hurricane brewing inside of her and it deserves an Oscar, damnit.

Julianne, commented on the last entry and said she is banging her head on the table because I'm being nonsupporting of the writers' strike. I'm a consumer. I like to consume. And, when all I have to consume are reruns and reality shows that have grown (dare I say it) even more tasteless...I would like to say come on, write! And, yes I would like to call myself an artist, but a true artist (like the writers call themselves) doesn't give a shit about money. In the world of punk rock, that's called selling out. I myself am proud of the fact that I pursue a career of selling out and moneys.

Price: 3 hours I'll never get back waiting for Atonement to win something.

I'm taking a year off from the hassles and stress of an ivy-league education and living at home in DC. However, this implies that school was in the least bit stressful. That would imply that I went to class, read the textbooks that I bought, and took the exams. Instead of doing all those things that a good student should do, I went clubbing, shopping, restaurant-ing, movie theater-ing...and spent the rest of the time at home on the couch playing video games, watching tv, and movies. They say that the gay community has a higher indispensable income because we can't reproduce offspring, and yet we still find a way to do so.

Now the best entertainment is always free (but not the most luxurious) and with my new computer I've taken to watching TV shows online again. One show that's caught my eye is FX's Dirt with Courtney Cox. This isn't a must-see, but it's definitely a must-check-out-at-least-once.

FX shows have become an obsession starting with Nip/Tuck. Initially a bit rough, Dirt won me over with Courtney Cox's hotness and the twisted story plots, especially Lucy Spiller's (Cox) schizophrenic best friend and main photographer Don. Sometimes I feel bad for Lucy, the editor-in-chief of DirtNow, a tabloid. The rest of the 99% of the time I can't believe the stunts she pulls actually could work out in the real world.

Season 2 is starting up next weekend, March 2nd on FX at 10pm Eastern Time. Do yourself a favor and check it out. Maybe then I'll have someone with whom I can talk about the show. Come on, people.

On a more recent matter (more like in less than one and a half hours), the Oscars start. Aside from the fact that the stupid writer's strike may have crapped this one up, I'm looking forward to seeing Atonement with Keira Knightley and James McAvoy win big. I'll be back to blog after the show to rant or rave.


Price: Free (Cable subscription not included)

Connected to the world again...

In this day and age, how does anyone live without their own personal laptop? I know you've probably never thought about this, but some people don't have computers. Luckily, I no longer belong to that lower level of humanity. Of course since my laptop was stolen at the Olive Garden in Philadelphia (1346 Chestnut Street) and by one of their good-for-nothing employees, I've had to live without one.

Last week, I got a brand new Dell.
And with my purchase, or my mom's money, I was able to give a small percentage to help fight the AIDS epidemic in Africa. That's right. I'm here now, writing about luxuries such as a high-tech laptop, and someone in Africa is suffering from AIDS.

Dell and Windows will contribute $80 for every XPS ONE (PRODUCT) RED sold, which pays for over 6 months of life preserving anti-retroviral medication for a person living with AIDS in Africa. Dell and Windows will contribute $50 for every (PRODUCT) RED notebook sold, which pays for nearly 4 months of life preserving anti-retroviral medication for a person living with AIDS in Africa. Dell will also make a contribution of $5 for every 948 All-in-One (PRODUCT) RED printer sold, which is 11 days of life-preserving anti-retroviral medication for a person living with AIDS in Africa.

Basically if you don't get the XPS One (PRODUCT) RED, you're cheating someone out of $30 of life-saving medication and possibly 2 months of healthy living. Hmm. But, that's better than nothing, no?

Did I mention that I'm hella excited to play Assassin's Creed on my XPS starting April 8, 2008?

Price: Dell, $1,149 (starting price) including $50 of good will for helping an AIDS sufferer out; Assassin's Creed for PC, $49.99 on amazon.com.